10 years without you and no end

Eight days from now it will be 10 years ago my mother died. There isn't a day that goes by that I dont think about her. The fact that i'm starting to forget things about her is scaring me. I'm forgetting the sound of her voice and thats whats most important to me. Everyday I fear of forgetting everything about my mother. I want to remember and I need to remember for me and my children in the future. Sometimes I hate God for taking her away, sometimes I dont feel that shes gone, sometimes I'm fine with the way things are. Sometimes I get really depressed and angry other times I kind of forget shes been dead for nearly ten years. I love my mother and I miss her very much. At times I need her so badly but I remember that i've been by myself for so long and I've never needed anyone but myself or my fiancee, well ex, whatever you get the point. There are a lot of times when I hate being alone but its been like that for so long I dont know how to be any way else.